My daughter is the Wish Fairy this week at her high school. Students put their requests in the Wish Box and she and the leadership team do their best to grant them. This morning she showed me the list of wishes she has received, and I was struck by their simplicity.
My first thought was, “Wouldn’t it be nice if adult wishes were that easy to grant?” And that got me thinking about the Universe again. It will grant our wishes if we are clear and concise. (See Door Slam post) I believe this, yet I found myself thinking, “but adult wishes seem so big.” After some consideration, I concluded that the size of a wish is a matter of perspective. If you have never eaten a donut, and your parents would never buy one for you, it might seem crazy to ask the school to give you one. Or if you have never been recognized publicly for anything, you might think, “Why would anyone say something about me? There’s nothing to say.” And yet, you had the courage to ask the Wish Fairy to give you a shout-out at the rally. The Wish Fairy hears your request and thinks, “Sure, we can do that. No problem.” She has no mental dialogue about whether you deserve to be recognized. Of course you do—everyone does!
What struck me next was my feeling of compassion for these kids. Every fiber of me wanted to see them get their wishes. I was moved by their innocence. I think that’s how the Universe feels about all of us. We are all innocent. Sometimes greedy, selfish, or hurtful, but still innocent. Like children, we wade through the world and do our best with what we understand.
In his book, Just Mercy (a must read!), Bryan Stevenson talks about how we are more than the worst thing we have ever done. He contends that, more than anything else, mercy has the power to change the world. I agree. I agree. I agree. You are more than the worst thing you have ever done. Your worth exists beyond your deeds. (See Perfection post)
How to use it: If you find yourself upset about something someone has done, and you are listing all the reasons it was wrong and bad, take a minute to pause and rise. Rise to the vantage point of the Universe. This is not about excusing behavior, it is about releasing the need to evaluate it. Whatever the behavior was, it’s not about you. It’s about the other person. Let them follow their path free from your judgement. Ultimately, your judgement is about yourself. Give yourself the opportunity to follow your own path, free from your judgement.
Example: You read an article about someone who shot and killed another person. You feel outraged and upset. Maybe you think the shooter is a monster. Maybe you think the other person deserved it. Maybe you think better gun laws would have prevented it. This is the perfect time to rise up and look from above. Look at our species trying to navigate this complex world. Look at how we are so connected that we care enough about someone whom we don’t even know, to spend our time evaluating what they have done. Remind yourself we are all doing our best, and go out and do your best.
“When we know better, we do better.” – Maya Angelou
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